The problem, says Leah as she feels behind it the pressure of hundreds of marchers, the problem is that I do not know why I have to rebuild myself. One morning in May, she stood up and everything was complicated. The day before, nothing, no real problem, some financial troubles, a little trouble at all. And then the next morning it was as if the sky had fallen on his head, and she could not get out of bed for two days. Unable to move. Unable to do anything but cry, cry tears that she came from nowhere, who swallowed, choked him. She thought she would die there in his bed on a Saturday in May, while the outside looked like spring to summer. She left the blankets and take over the tears ceased to hold the hoarse cry that shook his body and waited death.
But death did not come. And Leah found momentum, enough to go to the doctor, between bicycles and taxis.
She's better, certainly. Do not spend hours curled up in bed to settle her room and crying sounds she can not recognize. They came from so far. For a few weeks in July, Leah hoped that appeasement announced the end of the vacuum. She wanted to find, look in the mirror without scorn, without seeing the emptiness in her eyes that waved again. But since August, since August 17 in fact, Leah realized that the drug cocktail and the calm smile of his psychologist did hide the fact that big hole that replaces it.
August 17, Leah put on her best dress, the one that always gave him the urge to turn on itself to feel the smoothness and wrinkling of the fabric. The wedding of her friend Eleonora, on a ship, cruising the Hudson River, Leah smiled, while her dress tossed to the wind and the photographer looked into her telling him to settle a bit on the left. She danced, drank a little, ate well. His friends told him she had finally looks better. She nodded, grabbed a glass of champagne. Smiled. It was not a fake smile. But She did not smile for what they all believed.
Leah has never liked to leave things in plan. She came home very late marriage of Eleonora, drunk of sun and sea air. The mind clear, cons, for the first time since that May morning.
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